The most difficult question....

Im not saying that there is an easy answer to life biggest questions. I think anyone who thinks so is seriously lacking if they think that they are easy. Recently, I've been thinking about God. you know, like you do. I know right? run from the room in terror! I grew up with relgion and its always on my mind. I've gone from deeply spirtual to well deeply skeptical. Those who know me, know its a constant sore point of discussion with me.
This is a big deal especially for my family who feel there son,brother is indeed headed directly for hell. The biggest question i've been asking myself lately is about life its self and its suffering. Recently there was a murder of a 7 year old girl who was killed rather quickly and then stuffed in a suitcase and dumped into a ravine. How does anyone see God in that? She grew up in a trailer park, knowing nothing beyond Hannah Montana dolls and Ponys. Big questions do not phase someone this young. Heaven and Hell and eternity all that. So, God is supposed to be this loving person that has a plan for us all? Try explaining that without making all sorts of theological excuses for yourself. If God is THAT mysterious then he truly hates us. If God some how did it to teach someone somewhere a lesson about something that might come in handy at sometime in some place. Come ON.
I saw Ty Pennington give a dying man's family a house....and all I could think about was how many families watched there father die this year and didn't get a fucking dream home. Got left with nothing. It's unfathomable how unfair life is? and yet there are still christians who believe that prayer will change things....maybe it changes some but what about those who are left wanting?
Fact remains we live in a fucked up world....There is no other world for it. Day in and Day out a million little tradgedies will occur to the perfectly nice and the perfectly evil. I don't know if there's a god or not. I'd bet that the God people keep telling me exists dosen't though. I just can't comprehend that God. The one that absolutely is a certian way because the bible industputibly says that he is. Sorry I don't buy it.
Yet I cannot fully abandon the concept of some being that made us (through evolution). These are my thoughts, that is all.